Working on

12/10/12. I need to work on making my thesis a little bit more specific. I need to use my big vocabulary more everyday so that in my essays it doesn't look like I just used a thesaurus and didn't use the words properly. I also need to proofread slower so that I notice small errors that I make. Self assessment: I like my style. It flowed, i had hooks, transitions, good sentences, active verbs, varied sentences, and good paragraph unity. I think that writing it all in one big push would help me with my transitions. Also proof reading better would help me find all of my small errors. Using my vocab better would also make my essay flow better and strengthen the intelligence in my writing. I noticed that my style was a combination of informality, argument, and formal intelligence. I think I did a good job.



Better penmanship


Rachael and I are going to film ourselves playing the roles of collins and Lizzy (and maybe Mr. and Mrs. Bennett). We will modify the original words to make them more modern, funnier, and more relatable. We will probably use plenty of over-the-top gestures and facial expressions to make the scene funnier and less awkward. I'm looking forward to it.

I need to work on polishing my ideas more befor putting them to words, or polishing them more after writing them. I need to clarify what I say better and either use parallel structure or avoid using sentences that require it. I need to remember to use MLA format! I need to realize that I can't write everything that I would normally say in person when I am writing an essay I will turn in. I need to choose shorter quotes or find a way to shorten the ones that are too long. I need to realize that on some points I need to add more detail. I need to make my writing flow like a placid stream Rather than a cacophonous crashing of liquid on rocks. My thesis should be the clearest point of the essay, not the hardest to understand. If I work on all of these, I can go by the path of least resistance by using my signature informal tone in actual schoolwork.

I need to watch out for being too casual. When using verbs that are essential to my argument, I need to use better/more descriptive ones. Don't say definitively what a dead author thought, just say that the point I made shows that she felt this way. Use the proper words for the situation (I used entail in the wrong places a few times. Work on transitions between paragraphs, because I don't always do that well. Jonah, you dummy, avoid grammatical and awkward errors.. You know them and you know how to fix them.

Temporary idea for hamlet movies thesis: the tones, emphases and cadences of the different hamlet actors from the Mel Gibson version and the sarcastic version significantly affect the meaning of the lines. How do we watch the videos at home?